For communication to be complete, the sent message has to be received by the decoder and feedback given. This entails listening to the message for direct verbal communication, reading the message for text messaging, or gesture decoding for sign messages.
I am associated with people oriented listening. More often than not during communication, I usually identify with the speaker. I listen to whatever is being said and try to get into the speakers’ mind in an attempt to get his inclination, state of mind and perspective. In my world, communication goes beyond the message and words. It includes the emotion, tone and personality of the communicator. It is through this bonding process that the right feedback to communication is given.
During conversations I tend to get my energy from whoever is speaking in the sense that, “the more I listen the more attentive I become.” To get someone to open up I implore to his or her vulnerability, portraying myself as harmless and friendly. Professionally, people oriented listening is an invaluable skill when handling victims of traumatic episodes e.g. Post-Traumatic-Stress patients, persons with personality disorders, slow learners and recovering victims of abuse. I this line of listening filters are ignored. The professional has to listen to everything for them to be able to ascertain the very cradle of the problem affecting an individual.
Much as the above discussion hails people oriented listening, it is with a dark side too. People oriented listeners tend to get drawn into unwise relationships in the pretext of getting to understand the speaker and it just the message. Their ability to willingly pry into others’ businesses as they seek to connect with them may be misconstrued by others who are introverts. Because of these such people end up being shunned and accepted in equal measure at the work place and in society.
Changing Works. How we change what others think, feel, believe and do . 2002-2009. changing works. 26 03 2019 <http://changingminds.org/techniques/listening/listening_styles.htm>.